History Always Repeats Itself

Sooooooo, here’s a little bullet list to catch you guys up:

• I started my Junior year *cheers and roaring applause* 😀 which is the hardest year *gasps* D:
• I visisted the head doctor *cheers and roaring applause* 😀 And I really am crazy only it’s okay cause they make pills for it! *standing-freaking-ovation* :DDDDDDDDD
• I’ve decided Art School is a no-no
• aaaaaaannnnd, I re-realized my immense affinity for animals.

So, as I am sure you all know (and if you don’t then you do now) that I am consistently inconsistent, and you can take that statement all the way to the bank ;D Well, I’m not sure if I’ve told EVERYONE, but many people do know that I have been very adamant about majoring in film and becoming a famous film director/screenwriter. But the keywords here are “have been”. Past tense. As in: “This no longer interests me…”. And this whole shift was very sudden, even for me! Considering that I have done hours and hours of research over the past 3 years, it was a big shock that I just decided against it so quickly.

But I digress, A career of movie making is a nice dream and all but it’s sort of a roll of the dice. And I’d rather not play craps with my future because many a time I have envisioned myself living in my car heating up a Cup-O-Noodles using the heat from the vents…. Not a pretty glimpse into the crystal ball. So I woke up, and it’s better now than when I’m rooming in the back seat of a house-on-wheels (Haha :3 I can’t even drive).

Allow me to further explain my reasoning for dropping yet another dream, because this time I actually have a reason 😀

Becoming a bigshot filmmaker is a longshot for anybody, but it is EXPONENTIALLY more difficult if you are a girl.

Because those little girls become grown women and unfortunately, those grown women become old ladies.

I know I can’t be the only one in the world to notice but I AM the only person who I’ve actually heard say it, and that is that the Hollywood film industry is predominately MALE, and these men can be virtually any age and be popular: Young (Jared Hess), Middle-Aged (Sam Raimi), and even OLD (Steven Spielberg).

In Hollywood they have easy as cream cheese -___-

But for women filmmakers the moment you are no longer hot and young is the very moment they right you off…. *coughdiablocodycough*…. o.o And the only reason for this is the fact that the film industry in Hollywood is run by Men.

Okay, so to connect my all random spiel dots:

I realized that if I wanted a steady, solid, SUCCESSFUL career as an adult that could, potentially, last me the rest of my life, I had to refocus and reprioritize and… grow up. I had to consider a major and a career that would consider me as valid as an old woman as it would as a young lady.

So I spent an afternoon in the vet’s office just waiting to be called. The room was occupied by dogs, it had interesting magazines, fur covered furniture, and the scent of doggie fragrance and it hit me….. I FREAKING LOVE DOGS! As a matter of fact I freakin’ love ALL ANIMALS! I ALWAYS HAVE! I’ve just never had as many pets as I wished, mostly because I’ve never lived in a real house for very long, and also because my mom hates animals. Every animal… O~O’

So my Big Decision of the Month was my verdict to study veterinary medicine to become a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine 🙂

But I’ve always said it though, for as far back as I can remember.

When I was five.

When I was eight.

When I was ten.

I just tried my hardest to supress it.

But I guess what my best friend Jesse told me once is actually true:

“History always repeats itself.”

🙂

~ZoeyRenée